Therapy

We had therapy last night. Paulette(our therapist) gave us a checklist to determine the areas that Alyssa needed to work on. She told Alyssa that everything on the list was normal "family kid" behavior. We discovered that we are about 1/2 way there. While Alyssa loves to cuddle and spend time with us, she still does not trust us completely. How do I know this? Well, by the areas on our checklist that we still need to work on. She has never fallen asleep in my arms. She doesn't seek us out when she is sad or lonely. She still thinks that we are going to "give her away". Those were her words by the way! We have come so far, but we still have a long way to go.

Helping Alyssa through her trauma has triggered memories of Jeff's past abuse. He was abused by his father and never put the past behind him. He just buried it in his past and it has now come back to haunt him. He starts therapy tonight with an adult trauma therapist that also specializes in EMDR. I am hoping and praying that he is able to resolve his issues and make peace with his past. I need my husband. Raising a RAD is stressful enough without having to do it all yourself.(Lisa, I really don't know how you do it!) . I am a person that needs to talk and hash things out and not being able to use my husband as a sounding board, or even have a serious conversation with him is taking its toll. I think that was a big reason for me starting this blog. It really does help to have a place to vent! I hope that Jeff comes back to me soon, it is hard living with a ghost of who your husband used to be!