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Friday, April 25, 2008

Trust

I think Alyssa is finally starting to trust us! How do I know this? Well, good question. There hasn't been one defining AH HA moment. I just realized this morning that Alyssa was actually talking to me about her feelings. We were talking about the fact that she was careless with her reading book from school, set it down at day care and now it's gone. I told her that she would have to tell her teacher that she lost the book, and she would have to pay for it. As we were talking, she kept telling me to stop talking about it. She usually does this when she feels bad, or uncomfortable about something. Instead of feeling safe enough to talk about it, she keeps everything inside and then ends up getting angry! Well, anyway, this morning she looks me right in the eye and told me she was lying about the book!!! She really did leave it at day care but she originally told me that she left it in the gym. Come to find out, she took it out to the playground and left it there! I was so angry that she took her book outside because we have had MANY instances with Alyssa leaving her things at day care and we have given her strict guidelines regarding her school things. Being the great Mom that I am, I pushed down my anger and PRAISED Alyssa for telling the truth! We talked about how important it was to tell the truth and why it was important! Alyssa then told me that she thought she should get TV taken away for a week because she lied. I asked her what she thought she would learn from that? She thought about it and said she probably wouldn't learn anything. I told her that her consequence for lying would be to write a letter to Mom & Dad, apologizing for lying. She also needed to include in her own words, why it is so important to tell the truth. She also needs to tell her teacher that she lost the book, and that she would be paying for it.

The point to this story is that I realized that for the first time, Alyssa opened up and talked about something without getting angry! She was able to express her feelings, and her disappointment in herself! She also realized that the reason she lied in the first place was because she thought Mom & Dad would be more upset about leaving the book on the playground than in the gym!

My tootsie is starting to really care what we think, not because she might get into trouble, but because she wants us to be proud of her!

Like we could be any prouder of that brave little girl, our darling daughter Alyssa!!!

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